Since my family and I have returned to church I have been reading my Bible more. Somedays I forget to read but at least I know where it is! Great success!! I'm reading Philippians and feel as though I'm reading it with fresh eyes. One thing I read the other day that has stayed with me is how Paul encouraged the Philippians to refrain from grumbling and disputing. I thought it was interesting that he pointed to that to show Christlikeness. Since then I've realized that I complain a lot. The problem isn't the complaining, it's my heart of impatience and entitlement.
I can see the Lord changing my heart in a few ways. One way I am changing is how I react to my neighbor who drives a stupid, loud, 4-wheeler. Any mother will tell you that all rules are off if you wake a sleeping baby. Luckily my son is a deep sleeper but the kid who lives across the street has woken him up a few times with his stupid, loud, 4-wheeler. I have come so very, very close to running out my front door with a skillet in one hand (to kill) and the baby monitor in the other screaming like a crazy person. I've plotted several missions that map out routes to nearby ponds but the Holy Spirit has kept me from highjacking and drowning his Christmas present. How is God working in my heart? Well, the 4-wheeler sits unscathed and the kid lives. That's as good as it gets.
I think patience is one of the toughest areas for me. I'm incredibly impatient with my computer. The battery is dead so if the plug comes out it turns off. My dog Cody has a toy chicken and when he wants to play he'll come running at me with it dangling from his mouth and ricochet off my leg. The problem is, he'll knock the cord out while in ricochet. I get so frustrated!
My prayer is to have a heart and mind set on gratitude and thanks. When I hear the 4-wheeler driving down the road I'll take a deep breathe and say a prayer focused on thanks and hopefully this will squish murderous thoughts. With God, all things are possible. I think a talking-to is in order as well.
In dealing with my computer, I think a new battery is in my future. In the mean time, if my dog Cody causes it to unplug, I will take a deep breathe and toss his chicken instead. Yes, you read that correctly.
My heart is continuing to draw nearer to the Lord even though I don't always spend time in His Word and want to steal Christmas presents from children. Thoughts?
3 comments:
Thanks for sharing your heart Ashley! I'm so happy that your heart is drawing near to the Lord. Patience is a process and just when I think I'm better something pushes one of the buttons I thought I didn't have anymore! I love how God reveals my flesh to me slowly and over time so I'm not overwhelmed and wanting to give up! What's encouraging to me when I read His word is how many times the *heroes* of the faith were dull of understanding, fell, got up, etc. God rewards even a small effort on our part to know Him. Darn that 4-wheeler! Sleep well, sweet Evan!
By far, the most effective method that God has used to get my attention away from my own opinions about how the universe should be run is suffering; a little bit of my suffering and a whole lot of other people's.
I've been enormously blessed to work with the DBC SWEAT Team for a while, and I really can't stop yammering to everyone I meet about the spiritual rewards of stepping into someone else's dirty life and working alongside them to get a tiny thing done. Their thankfulness for God's blessing of our minuscule work and the "luxury" it affords them...gives me a better perspective. For the last few years, I didn't need God to give me one single dollar more than I had, as long as He would keep giving me such clarity about the value of what He has already provided.
I LOVE that your husband and son are blessed with you as the woman of the house, and I want to encourage you to see these problems as,...well, fantastic problems to have.
This should be a fun comment for you since this post is over 5 years old. Thanks for the reminder about grumbling and Christ-likeness. The annoying sound of 4 wheelers prompted my 'grumpy search' and this was the perfect antidote! Love it! Back to praising!
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