Fire Marshal Bill

Being a Mother is so much better than I thought it would be and I thought it would be awesome.  If people saw me interacting with my son during the day they would think I was crazy.  Does anyone remember the Dad in So I married an Axe Murderer?  Well, I like to dance like him in the kitchen.   l also like to talk like Ace Ventura and quote movie lines to my infant child.   My husband and I do the same thing with each other.  Our favorite is imitating Fire Marshal Bill from In Living Color, "LET ME SHOW YA SOMETHING".   There was a day last week when every time my son would cough he would toot at the same time.  I don't care who you are...that's funny.  I made up a song called Coughs and Toots.  Most of the songs I make up involve toots.  He likes broccoli.   My son is the sweetest gift I have ever been given.

The love and joy that I have in my son is doing sweet things in my heart.   My heart has had a difficult time seeing God as a loving Father.   I can imagine Jesus thinking, "what more can I do for her to see that I love her?".  When I was serving in the college ministry at Denton Bible Church, my heart wasn't in a great place.  For the record, the problem wasn't the ministry, it was my heart.   I was exhausted and peace was scarce.   My friend Melissa saw my struggle and was such an encouragement.  She had just read a book called Desiring God by John Piper. Jesus used this book to begin changing my heart.   Piper points to, and writes about Scripture in a way that helped me wrap my head around God's love in a deeper way.

Someone who I believe to be a king of encouragement is my High School Youth Director, Keith Chancey.   I would visit him and his wife, Karen, on occasion after I graduated.  When God started to show me how distant my relationship was with Him,  I started pulling away from ministry. I thought that I needed to quit everything to refocus my focus.  During this period,  Keith discouraged me from quitting everything, but instead, to serve as a leader in the High School ministry.  After praying about it and realizing that a boy I liked was serving there, I decided he was right.  Turns out, he was very, very right.   The relationships that I built while serving in the High School ministry are still special to me.   I became best friends with Whitney Blake on the car ride up to the leadership retreat.  We laughed the whole way and I literally said to her, "Let's be best friends!" and she said "OK!".  That girl has stuck with me through some tough times over the last 11 years;  I'm so thankful for her.    My heart was starting to struggle with the right things and I was surrounded by people who, I felt, loved and understood me.